Stepmom refuses to fully pay her 20-year-old stepdaughter's $3400 medical bill for swallowing an AirPod: 'She claims that she swallowed her AirPod in her sleep and has no memory of it'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Apr 4, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

When do you stop being responsible for your adult children's medical problems? The US government says that once you turn 26, you can no longer use your parent's health insurance, but not everyone stays on it for that long. I've had my own insurance since I was 22, and some people get forced off of their family's plan the second they turn 18. College age is an ambiguous time for personal financial responsibility. There are 18-year-olds who are working and paying for literally every expense that they have and just making it by. In the same college town, there are 22-year-olds whose whole lives are financed by their parents, who spend hundreds of dollars at bars every weekend. Neither of these circumstances are inherently good or bad, but families need to decide how much financial responsibility they will take on for their college students who are technically adults, but not really. 

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  • The stepmom in this story wants her 20-year-old stepdaughter to take at least some personal responsibility for her stupid actions. She swallowed an AirPod (you read that right) during her Spring Break trip and racked up a $3400 medical bill. While she doesn't insist that she pay for the whole thing, she thinks she should at least pay for part of it. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10489818880
    via Mike Lloyd

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    AITA for requesting my step-daughter pay 1/3 of her ER visit because she swallowed an Airpod?

    My step-daughter (20) was on a spring break trip with her friends. One night she got dr_nk and ate an edible. She claims that she swallowed her AirPod in her sleep and has no memory of it. I don't see how that's possible. She woke up next to her mother I might add and realized she had a missing AirPod. She called the ER
    via u/anonymousmom4
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    via John M. Smit

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    and they told her to come in for an x-ray. They told her to come back for a second x-ray to make sure it had passed. We got the bill because she is under our insurance. We haven't met our deductible this year, so we owe $3400. I told my husband I think her mom and her should pay 1/3.
    via u/anonymousmom4
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    He doesn't think his daughter should have to pay anything. I don't really know why. I wouldn't actually take money from her. I'd ask her to forgo her birthday and X-mas from us until the debt is paid. AITA for requesting my step-daughter pay for part of an ER bill that was totally avoidable had she been sober.
    via u/anonymousmom4
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    UPDATE- My husband said she called Urgent Care, and they told her to go to the ER because of the lithium battery which could be toxic. Also, there is some debate in the story about when/how it was swallowed. He says she went to sleep with her Airpods in for white noise. She
    via u/anonymousmom4
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    woke up with something in the back of her throat, swallowed, and realized too late it was the Airpod. We've never told her she can't use her health insurance.
    via u/anonymousmom4
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    UPDATE #2- Due to many comments, I think the most fair option would be for the mother to pay half of the daughter's share of the deductible which would be $550. The mother is not a bad mother. We don't get along, but she's a good mother that makes bad choices
    via u/anonymousmom4
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    sometimes as we all do. Moving forward, there will need to be a discussion on who pays what of the medical expenses which we did not do before this happened. The kids get around $1500 cash deposited directly in their personal accounts for birthday and Christmas from our side of the family. I meant she could use
    via u/anonymousmom4
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    that money to pay the bill. I will not ask my SD to pay any of this bill, but moving forward there will need to be a conversation on who pays what. In general, SD is a great kid. I'm hoping this is a one-off. She's going to NYC for her 21st birthday in August with her mom, so I think some kind of guidelines should be set about who pays for stupid mistakes while intoxicated.
    via u/anonymousmom4
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    via Cj (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    PsycheAsHell NTA- With all due respect, that is a truly TRULY stupid reason to have to go to the ER, and I'd be mad if I had to fork out a few thousand because my grown step-kid somehow swallowed a ear bud while dr nk. She should absolutely be paying a portion of that back. She's 20 years old ffs.
    via u/PsycheAsHell
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    heideejo Yes, she is an adult. That is her bill...
    via u/heideejo
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    Ancient Brief_2568 This A grown a woman needs to be paying her own bills that result from her own stupidity and poor life choices. I'd be making her pay the WHOLE thing herself. They have payment plans available, she's a big girl, she can handle it.
    via u/Ancient_Brief_2568
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    xassylax I wear my AirPods to bed every night and like clockwork, they fall out every night. Never once has one ended up in my mouth. They've ended up in odd places like between the bed and the wall or in my shirt but never in my mouth. The weirdest place was when I couldn't find one so I used the Find My app to play a noise to find it but no matter where I moved and looked, it sounded like it was right next to me. Turns out, it had fallen
    via u/xassylax
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    out of my ear and landed in my hair, getting tangled up in my bun. That explains why it sounded like it was right next to me even when I got out of bed and was looking on the floor. But again, never has a ear bud ended up in or anywhere near my mouth.
    via u/xassylax
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    I'd be willing to bet this was the result of some dumb dare or some other stupid thing she did where she willingly and knowingly put it in her mouth and then accidentally (or maybe even intentionally for a dare) swallowed it. If she's old enough to drink and consume edibles then she's old enough to pay for medical bills that are a result of those activities.
    via u/xassylax
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    Acceptable-Map-3490 if she has no memory of swallowing the airpod (which i also do not believe) bc she did it in her sleep then why in holy h I would the first thought upon not being able to find the airpod be "mustve swallowed it" not like "its a tiny thing i probably dropped somewhere while drink and high”
    via u/Acceptable-Map-3490
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    like i just??? that wouldn't even be the 272367272 thought. NTA ur daughter is a dumba and should pay for her own medical bills. i mean its fine to help her out, but she should at least contribute to some of it
    via u/Acceptable-Map-3490
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    kent1146 100% thought this too. There is just No. Way. that you wake up to a missing airpod after a night of drinking, and think that you swallowed it.
    via u/kent1146
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    You would think that you dropped it or lost it somewhere. She knows she swallowed it because she remembers swallowing it, and then lied to the mom
    via u/kent1146
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    Professional_Pop8867 Ummm I'd pass it fully on to her. She's 20 years old. But def not the AH for asking 1/3 only... Is her mom also paying 1/3?
    via u/Professional_Pop8867
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    anonymousmom4 OP We can't force the mother to pay 1/3. I'm hoping she chooses to do so. The money is not a burden for us or her in that we have it to pay. That being said, it's still a lot of money. It's not nothing for us.
    via u/anonymousmom4
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    UnusualPotato 1515 She needs to pay for her actions. I get paying for her if it was something like pneumonia or a car accident, but she ate an Airpod whilst intoxicated - that's all on her & needs to learn a lesson.
    via u/UnusualPotato1515
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    zealot_ratio This is a hard one, because from your further statements/responses, this is not indicative of her normal behavior. And while she's an adult at 20, she's still a dependent in school (assumedly?) so she's not truly independent and likely not earning income (?). A one time mistake, to me, is different than a pattern of behavior. Yes, I'd be upset with her. Yes, it's a comment on our medical system that a simple set of x-rays leaves you with a huge bill. and yes, there should definitely
    via u/zealot_ratio
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    with her. She's a good kid by your description who made a mistake. Part of being a parent, even to college age kids, is being there for them when they make a mistake. If she had been skateboarding, and broke her leg, would you feel the same, or is it the substances involved that shape your concern? Your request is not irrational, but I think the lack of a pattern shifts this subtly into a "this is a parenting cost" category...the first time. I think there's a balance of values here, between the
    via u/zealot_ratio
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    EagleEyezzzzz Agreed. She's 20 and probably in college. OP said they can afford it. I would chalk this up to, sometimes kids do dumb stuff and it s ks. And yes a 20 year old dependent is still a kid.
    via u/EagleEyezzzzz
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    Persistent_Earworm Telling her & her mother not to leave you to foot the entire medical bill is entirely reasonable. But gee whiz, leave birthdays and Christmas out of it, unless you're trying to come across as a wicked stepmother.
    via u/Persistent_Earworm
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    Two-Theories Agree 100% with you. Also, pressing it may lead to the kid not seeking medical help in the future because she'd be worried about having to pay some amount back, particularly as contributing was not previously discussed either before she went for the xray, or at all e.g, when putting her on the insurance.
    via u/Two-Theories
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    I would also guess that if she got drank and seriously injured, a contribution of costs wouldn't be considered/raised then, so it may not be about the substances but more about how stupid of a situation it is. Stupid things happen and more so after stupid decisions, but a young person knowing that their parents care more about their health and safety in those moments can make all the difference. No one wants to be the parent asking "why didn't [kid] say anything? we could have helped."
    via u/Two-Theories

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family drama stepmother spending money mother emergency room hospital stepchild stepmom stepdaughter medical bills spring break family partying mom money
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